Stockist Update: Lowestoft

Lowestoft library is now stocking The Merfoxiad.
The Merfoxiad is a narrative poem in the mock epic style. It concerns an ancient being of destruction and it’s unlikely adversary.
The Merfoxiad is available for £4, £1 of which will be donated to the libraries good cause.
I am very thankful for all stockists and grateful for their continued support.

Murky Water: A beginner’s experiences with Adwords

Pretty interesting reading for anyone looking into paid links and self promo.

Will McDaniel


YouTube is an overwhelming sea of “durge” with nuggets of gold floating on the top and some pretty good gems hidden below the surface suspended like silty sedimenty stuff. The problem is you can’t see the awesome suspended gems as they are hidden from view by the turgid lumpy bits floating on the surface. The durge can be overwhelming. Everyone loves a good excrement metaphor.

My point is that I struggle to gain exposure and views on YouTube. There is an awful lot of content for prospective viewers to sift through to even find one of my videos. Now i’m not trying to claim that my videos fall in the hidden gems category at all. I just find that from personal experience when searching for any content that might have taken time to write, edit and film that for every one of these I find I first have to wade…

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The Wii U: A fan boy’s perspective

Will McDaniel


Cards on the Table: I am quite the Nintendo fan boy. I love Nintendo. Always have.  However no matter how much I adore them I am still able to take a step back and view them objectively.

Adding a second card to my table of transparency; I will also admit that I own and love a Wii U. Love it like it were a rectangular plastic high glossed child of mine. In my opinion the console itself is great. Sure the processing power can’t match the other consoles in this new generation but the game pad opens up opportunities for original and fresh game play mechanics that limit stale reproductions of familiar titles. That’s not to say Nintendo doesn’t stick with its few tried and tested IPs, because it does, but the new iterations contain (or should contain) interesting new ideas and play styles.

However the console is dying. This…

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The Sainsburys advert

After seeing English supermarket chain Sainsburys new ‘christmas advert’ I can only guess at the ideas that didn’t make the cut:

British prisoners of war line up in single file, emaciated and weary as the SS officer walks amongst them. As he points them individually towards the labour camp or the mass grave a rustling can be heard as one cheeky soldier munches away on Sainsburys Ready Salted crisps, now with 33% extra free.

Helmand Province, an infantry patrol approaches a suspected Taliban-held village. Suddenly an IUD is triggered, three men are hit. The medic rushes towards the worst hit soldier and pulls new Sainsburys basics cheesecake from his pouch. The injured man nibbles away and his maimed leg miraculously heals as “Buy one, get one free” scrolls across the screen.

The young brigadier kicks his spur into his mount, the cannons loom in front of him as the Light Brigade tears into the valley. His men fall, screaming from their horses, all around him come the cries of the dying and the roar of cannonfire. The officer reaches into his jacket pocket and admires the swanky new packaging on his Sainsburys Lime Cordial.

Yes, please give money to and honour our veterans, but please don’t try to sell shit or make war pretty.
As Robert E.Lee once said “It is well that war is so terrible, or else we would grow too fond of it…nearly as fond as I am of these Sainsburys bourbon biscuits!”

The Merfoxiad release

Following Swannui and Cygnus and Be All; End All comes The Merfoxiad
The Merfoxiad is a mock epic piece, a tongue-in-cheek playful narrative concerning an evil fox beast and the young girl destined to stop it.

The Merfoxiad goes on sale week commencing 24th November and is available to buy in Beccles from Beccles Books, from Halesworth Library and Lowestoft Library.

Cover art and release notes coming soon.

The Merfoxiad V: Cerulean Seas of Caprice

The sand shakes and crumbles under my feet
As I draw near with drawn sword and blade between
My teeth, red raw with tired eyes and bleeding lips
Aching and shuddering with muscles drawn tight over hips
Legs like lead weights, heaving and hauling this limp, lithe
Frame slowly towards it’s final destination and the end
Of us all

Born down in the deep, dark brine with bellyful of
Baleful hate, an incisive, calculated, cold killing machine
Swam through cerulean seas of caprice
With icy blood coughing and seeping through it’s
Long dead veins
Surging forth towards Brighton sands
With two paws and razor claws intent on bringing death

And he says I’m all we have left
What a state of affairs when there is no
Fair fight to be had
I know I won’t walk away from this
The beast snarls and stares
As I approach, dare to approach
Dare to dream, to believe that
Of all the things in this world

This skinny little girl with a huge heavy sword
Could end this, could stop the dreams
The cold wet nights where I awake with a scream
Every second is eternity now
Every inch a mile
This fragile heart pumping louder than a bomb blast
Each tremulous beat thudding against thin sternum
Cracking and shaking my skeleton
The bone beneath thin flesh
Razor sharp, wrapped in knotted sinew strings

Dark sky light far too bright
Blinded and burning retinas and irises
Aching from the beauty of incandescent sun
Masked behind clouds and storm and squall
But grinding into these weary eyes

Ten metres more
It skulks by the shore
Sharp narrow eyes watching me
Waiting, salivating, dripping from the muzzle
The broadsword tightly clenched in firm, chapped hands
I charge, headfirst, headstrong and wholly resolute
Seeking the end, an end of all of this
An end of dreams that wake me at night
An end to visions that haunt my days
An end to pain, to fear, to all that I held dear
To anything I ever loved
Though for the life of me
I can’t remember what in my life ever meant as much
To me as my own sweet life

The blade connects with thick flesh, the white of the throat
The claws in my chest
Ribs crunch and crack
The hottest, sweetest thing I’ve ever felt
And the last
With every ounce of strength, every drop of blood
Every pound of muscle, every straining sinew
With the force of will and something else, something darker
Deeper, from within the core of myself
I thrust, push, force the great broadsword up
Through the neck
Gouging the throat
As razors cut and saw through my gut
Coughing up blood over white cotton
But still coughing, still standing, still breathing
Eye to eye with the beast from beneath

I never saved anything for the journey back
I always knew that none of this
Limp, frail form was ever built to last
Tied far too tight for far too long
Taut skin over gleaming sharp bones
A precise, surgical living weapon
Only the blood can pay for the blood
Only my life can take away his

As my sword hews through the jaw
Hacking deep into the brain of the beast
I hear nothing
Dead silence and pure
Crystalline, ice white light

I free one hand from the hilt
And grab tight the beast’s bloodied red ear
With one final ragged breath
I hold the jaws to my bared teeth and whisper
Screaming as loud as I ever could;

The sea god will see gods are destined to their deaths